Well, well, well. Welly, welly, welly. Wellity, wellity, wellity. Welcome back. How are you? Well? Us too! Picking up from where we left off – After spending the whole week with my moms, we left their house in Cedar Park a little sadder than when we arrived. It felt nice to be close to family, we’ve been missing family these past months. Having my brother there for Thanksgiving was nice too. After I dropped him off at the airport I headed back to the house where I met up with Kate who was just finishing up last week’s post. When she was finished we said our goodbyes and departed toward Hot Springs, Arkansas. Unfortunately we immediately ran into a bit of poor planning.

We had at some point in time intended to leave Cedar Park fairly early in the day, but seeing as we didn’t depart until almost 5 p.m. the seven and a half hour drive that lay before us didn’t seem feasible nor wise. So we agreed to break it into two chunks. We drove a few hours and ended up finding respite at a rest area just outside of the world famous town of Cumby, TX. But that was after a pit stop for another chicken sandwich … she is addicted. We were going to be trying our luck sleeping in another Cracker Barrel parking lot but the one we pulled into didn’t even ‘exist’ yet – it was still under construction. Something about trying to discretely sleep overnight at a construction site felt insecure so we left and stopped in Cumby.

In the morning we got up and headed to a Starbucks so Kate could actually finishing publishing her blog post (she had finished writing it but hadn’t made it public on the website yet). We also spent a minute or two in town at a grocery store picking up a few essentials. After stocking up on groceries we left town to finish the rest of our drive that got cut short the day before. There was a beautiful sunset along the way. That is one of the perks of the days being so short I suppose. Beautiful sunsets fall right in the middle of our lengthy drives. We pulled over to snag a picture of this one but as always, the pics never do it justice. We also snagged a bit of cotton that had blown loose from a nearby field, a gentle reminder of our trip through the southern states. When we got to our campground for the night we cooked up some soup and ate that along with a half-loaf of some really tasty focaccia bread we had picked up at the store earlier.

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The other perk of the shorter winter days is that spending a lot of time driving in the dark means that when you finally get to see your new surroundings in the daylight it is a surprise every time. We woke up lakeside at a gorgeous campsite that we luckily had all to ourselves. We spent the morning walking lakeside looking at the abundant quartz crystals that populated the area. I spent some time skipping stones, practicing my ‘sick moves’, and enjoying the sound of my voice reverberating off of the nearby alcoves of trees.

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We cooked up the usual breakfast of coffee and oats and then spent some time foraging for nuts. Yes, like squirrels. We were incredibly successful. It is actually really easy when you park immediately under a tree that has recently spilled thousands of nuts onto the ground. This tree, these nuts, were Mockernut hickorys. Mockernuts, for those not in the know, are visually similar to walnuts from the outside, the nut meat inside is also ~kinda~ similar. The primary difference is that the mockernut is like an armored fortress. The shells are really hard and thick. It takes about 3 minutes to crack one open and get to the tasty meat inside. That amount of effort led us to agree that we’d be better off storing the nuts in our cargo box until we get back, that way we could use some tools other than a small pair of pliers. It also means that along our journey our tiny living space has managed to pick up a box of books, some branches we fancied as walking sticks, a few cups of sea shells, and now a half gallon or so of nuts. Worth it!

The rest of the day was spent away from our campsite. We drove into Hot Springs, Arkansas and immediately up to the observation tower at the top of the National Park there. What a cool place. Stunning views of the surrounding mountain ranges that feed the hot springs that the little town is famous for. At the base of the small mountain that the tower is on top of is the main attraction – A row of victorian-style bathhouses. The rainwater falling onto the nearby mountains soaks into the ground and drains down toward superheated sections of earth where it immediately percolates back up through the cracks and crevices to come pouring out in natural springs at toasty hot temperatures, and it is nearly as pure as water can get too!

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The springs that feed the bathhouses here have long been touted as having some type of supernatural healing abilities, we just appreciate that the city has installed fountains where citizens can come and fill as many jugs as they want. We filled our jug to the brim with pure clean mountain spring water.

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There is a park and walkway that runs behind the row of bathhouses and it is also just a sight to behold. We hadn’t really thought much of coming to Hot Springs. To be perfectly honest, when we were planning our route forever ago – it just served as a quick detour place so that we could cross Arkansas off of the list. It absolutely blew away our expectations though.

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Before leaving we popped into Superior Bathhouse Brewery, a brewery that has opened up in one of the historic bathhouse buildings that remain. We grabbed a couple of our favorite appetizers and a couple beers as it was happy hour. Shishito peppers and a giant soft pretzel. When we left we knew we had a bit more driving to do to get to our next destination but didn’t want to have to search out a rest area along the way so we just headed back to the same campground we had been at the night before.

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On Wednesday we got up and again had our usual breakfast. We spent some time around the campsite again, this time collecting various quartz crystals. …books, sticks, shells, nuts, and now rocks… Then we headed into the next town; Russellville, AR. We’d be stopping at Planet Fitness for some much needed exercise and showering. The showering was much needed, the exercise was tolerated.

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Right next door to the gym was a coffee shop called Midtown Coffee where we popped in for some espresso con panna, which is just a fancy way of saying espresso shots topped with whipped cream. As a side note, I think every person under the age of 25 who lives in Russellville was probably in this coffee shop. All of them. At the same time. And it wasn’t even that busy. We just got the impression that there aren’t many hip young places to be in town. About 15 minutes later, after sipping down our tiny tiny coffees and using the free wifi we left. Our next destination was again a bit of a drive down the road. We had developed a hunger and pizza sounded like the answer.

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When we arrived at Roma Italian Restaurant in Ozark, AR we weren’t sure what to expect. We knew we wanted some pizza and looked at the menu enough to verify that they at least sold pizza. What we got, though, was so much better than we could have hoped for. We ordered some mozzarella sticks and a bruschetta pizza. Every thing was so good. Before the food that we ordered came to the table, they brought out a basket with fresh garlic bread and a small dish of oil, balsamic vinaigrette, and herbs. Then came the hand-made mozz-sticks, cooked to perfection along with a really tasty side of marinara. Then came our pizza. Everything was so flavorful and the best part was that it was all so cheap! We took our leftovers on the road with us when we departed.

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We were headed toward the Ozark National Forest but when we showed up at the campground that we had plugged into our GPS we immediately had second thoughts. The campground had been abandoned at some point in the past decade and looked overgrown, wild, and like a horror scene out of a movie or video game.

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So instead we left and drove the rest of the way into Fort Smith, AR and spent some more time using up free wifi to watch some tv, or in my case get some remote work done. Then we left and made our bed at yet another rest area.

The next morning we broke our fast on cold pizza. Today was scheduled to be a mostly coffee shop day. Those of you who have been following the blog know we have these from time to time. It is useful for us to camp up in a coffee shop while I get remote work done and to fill in a gap day where we don’t have much scheduled. Today’s shop was not a Starbucks however. We happened upon a place called Jim & Em’s in the town of Muskogee, Oklahoma. This place was so precious and unique. It is a full-service coffee shop with a drive-through window, all built into an old converted house. We both got drip coffee and got to pick out our own unique mugs.

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After exploring the various rooms of the house, we landed in the upstairs ‘executive’ conference room. A large wooden table surrounded with leather-bound chairs and a TV on the wall for presenting slides or business plans would be our home for the next several hours. From time to time a sweet older lady would come upstairs to offer us fresh bottles of cold water. I wonder if she was the eponymous Em. We loved hanging out here and wished more coffee shops felt like this. The pastries were really tasty too!

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When it was time to leave we made a quick tuna sandwich in the car before driving away. Then it was my turn for misfortune and disaster. While shifting in my seat, having just drained the excess liquid from the tuna canister, my phone dropped out of the car and landed in the pooled tuna juice in the parking lot. When I reached to retrieve it – the screen had cracked. Thinking about how much fun Kate had when her phone screen went through this ordeal just a month or so earlier, I guess I subconsciously felt it was my turn. Luckily, much like Kate, the crack that now adorns my phone screen isn’t too bad. It is just a single crack that in no way impairs the visuals nor the functionality. Unless I drop my phone again (while hanging upside down from some ramshackle exercise equipment) I suspect I’ll be fine not getting mine repaired until we get back to Vegas.

Alas, onward to Leisure Way Laundry.

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After our clothes were washed we headed out to our campsite for the evening at Wahoo Bay! Wahoo! We made it there without issue but when we arrived Kate checked her email and got some terrible news. Bank of America had informed her that some wahoo had stolen her debit card info and had charged about $600 to places like Armani, Victoria’s Secret, and Champs. The day had started out so well… Thankfully the bank had caught it pretty quickly and she isn’t being held responsible for the charges, and as of the time of writing has already been credited for the spurious purchases.

The morning brought us another surprise view of our locale. We had arrived at night and even though we had cooked dinner outside the night before we didn’t really know what our campground looked like. Turns out it was another beautiful lakeside spot with practically no one else around. It was extremely windy and cold though. Cold to the point of making it harder than usual to leave our cozy bed. Eventually we were able to shake off the allure of a warm bed to head into town.

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Our goal for the day was to see stuff. Big stuff! And we happened to be in just the perfect place to do it. Catoosa and Tulsa, Oklahoma are right along the old famous Route 66 and as such offer up some wacky roadside attractions. This may sound silly as we have been on the road for a bit over 5 months now but some of the best, iconic, road-trip-type activities and sites are yet to come. One of the first things that Kate had said she wanted to see on this big ol’ journey were these types of things – and chief among them: The Giant Blue Whale of Catoosa, Oklahoma. It did not disappoint. Located in a small pond, this bizarre structure serves primarily as a weird thing to look at but also as a diving platform and slide. We wandered about and climbed all over it for 10 minutes or so before heading off to our next attraction.

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The Giant Golden Driller in Tulsa, Oklahoma. It may be hard to believe but this is actually the 6th tallest statue in the country. A massive shirtless oil-worker standing next to an oil-rig. Built to celebrate the wonders and bounties that completely unfettered and unabated expansion of petroleum extraction and production has brought the world. …Let’s just look the other way for a moment while we selectively forget how that very expansion has now poised our planet with its greatest global threat. Onward!

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What next? Why my friends, it is none other than Buck Atom! Thee Buck Atom! Located at a renovated mid-century gas station is a looming figure whose style was ripped right out of a comic book. This 21-foot-tall space cowboy is a marketing attraction to bring attention to the Buck Atom Cosmic Curios gift shop inside the converted gas station. The store is a collection of memorabilia for the very roadside attractions that we were driving around seeing. It also hosts a number of other items and generally serves as a store whose merchandise celebrates the Great American Road Trip – it seemed fitting for us to stop in. Also outside is a large yellow robot, though it seemed to be missing a clamp/hand.

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After Buck, we set our sights on an oversized tooth outside of a dentist office. That one was less impressive.

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After dashing from place to place looking at absurd roadside attractions, we went down to Gathering Place. Gathering Place is a 100 acre, multi-use, riverside park. It has been ranked among America’s best parks. There is a little bit of everything for everyone. Huge playgrounds, a waterpark, an art museum, nature-walks, event spaces – it’s got it all. We walked around and played on the playground a bit before the sun set completely. It was then that we had to head out as we still had a few hours of driving to do this evening. I’ll say this though, Tulsa was cool. Surprisingly, actually, really cool. It is going on the list.

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A couple more hours of driving and we made a stop in the small college town of Stillwater, Oklahoma. Our intention was to visit Fuzzy’s Taco Shop. Without going into tons of detail, really good. We both got veggie tacos and veggie enchiladas, a smattering of sides, and even a margarita each. Out and about again, the road calls! Another hour plus of driving and we finally wind down in a rest area along the Oklahoma / Texas border.

Saturday we awoke and seeing as we had, again, several hours of driving ahead of us… We weren’t going to be making a lot of meals on these couple of drive-heavy days. It just takes too long to empty out the back of our car to move all the stuff we have to get down to the cooking equipment that we store in the back. So you know what that means. WAFFLE HOUSE! Yes, another one. Another simple breakfast with hash browns. We’re simple folk. Also, there aren’t any locations where we live so we gotta get ’em in while we can. Right?

Only downside – the nearest Waffle House was about 120 miles away. But on the upside, it was located in Amarillo, TX which is where we were headed anyway. We were also scheduled for an oil change, and a Planet Fitness visit in Amarillo as well. Additionally, we wanted to continue the trend of wacky roadside attractions and there happens to be a bunch of those in Amarillo as well. We plugged everything into our GPS and set out for the drive. When we got into town there was a bit of confusion as we had thought we were destined for the Waffle House first but our digital navigator deposited us in the middle of nowhere next to an empty field and happily proclaimed “You have arrived.”

We looked out the window and saw our roadside attraction: a pair of legs.

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The Legs of Amarillo are best summed up on this page but suffice to say they have a cool history and the Ozymandias poem which is found on an adjacent placard serves as a great reminder of hubris and the short time we have on this planet. The plaque at the statue is slightly dubious though. It presents the idea that the statue inspired the poem – but the poem was written in the early 1800s and the statue was commissioned by a man who died just a few years ago.

After seeing the legs, we sorted our GPS issues then went and got some food. While our food was being made I made a phone call to my great aunt Patti who you may remember from one of the very early posts on this blog. I had been trying to contact her several times throughout the trip but always seemed unable. She can send me text messages but when I reply, she never gets them. She also has a healthy skepticism of answering the phone but has recently added me to her landline’s approved list. So I gave her a call and did some catching up with her and her son Louis who I hadn’t spoken to in probably 25 years. It was good to catch up. When I got off the phone and was able to start attacking my meal properly, a local patron started asking us questions. He was smoking. You know how strange it is to see someone smoking in a restaurant these days? I’m certain he wasn’t supposed to be smoking but he also seemed like he was pushing 85+ and had been dining in that Waffle House longer than Kate or I had been alive – who was gonna stop him?

It’s funny how as soon as anyone finds out that Kate and I departed from Las Vegas, NV they immediately want to tell us about all the times they’ve gone there and gambled and how much money they won or lost. This guy won $1,200 one time. He also mumbled a warning for us to not go to Albuquerque, as it was “dangerous.” We finished our meal and left. A shower at the nearby Planet Fitness to wash the past few days of driving and cigarette smoke off of us and then we’d be ready to skip town again. It was here I overheard a stereotypical redneck-sounding guy harassing a black employee that he needed to vote, and that Kanye West was crazy. Texas is weird. Anyway, we still had that oil change to take care of. Once that was handled we settled in for yet another few hours of driving.

After passing what felt like endless farms and grasslands we stopped in Hobbs, New Mexico to relax and unwind in a Starbucks before they closed. We just needed a spot to zone out after driving for so long. Our final stop was where we’d be camping for the night. A little park and pond next to a gun range.

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We awoke to the sound of gunfire, the first time this happened to us it was alarming. This time, it was mildly annoying – like an alarm clock, except you can’t slap it into snooze mode without fear of being shot. We cooked breakfast and sat on a nearby bench which overlooked the small duck pond. Eating oats and watching ducks waddle about with indiscriminate gunfire in the background is really peaceful. Has this trip caused us to lose our minds? No, they were always a little off-kilter.

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As common on almost every day of this week, we had a couple hours of driving ahead of us. We packed up the car and set off to Carlsbad Caverns, New Mexico!!!!

Oh man. Just wow. If you’ll recall from the last time we visited a cave, I was giddier than a pig in slop. This time? Mammoth Cave is nothing compared to Carlsbad Caverns. No disrespect to Mammoth but this was amazing. Jaw-dropping rock formations at every turn. We hiked down in through the natural entrance and once we finished descending the nearly 800 feet down to where the cave mostly levels out we proceeded on the mile and a half long trek that loops around the main body of the cave. This is the largest limestone chamber in a cave in the western hemisphere. You can fit multiple airplane hangars in here. Nearly an Empire State Building underground and miles of space to walk around.

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There were just so many fascinating things to look at that we ended up taking the 75 minute walk at a pace of about 120 minutes. We kept stopping to admire stuff while overly-eager tourists would pass us by. How are you even taking this in at that pace? You can’t possibly be seeing all the stuff we are.

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I stopped to talk with a ranger who was posted up at a feature called “Top of the Cross” Which is the confluence of the two major fault lines that meet and provided the conditions necessary to form such a massive caverns. I asked about “Lower Cave” which is an area still being explored and is blocked off for scientific research. He seemed to appreciate my question (which was on the subject of 3D-Imaging of the caves) and Kate and I suspect that it isn’t often he gets questions from people who were as excited as I was. I LOVE CAVES! There are 35 miles of known caves down here and they are still finding new areas, how cool is that!?

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Anyway, when we left and made it back up to the surface the windstorm that greeted us put a damper on the soup we planned on cooking in the parking lot and so we defaulted back to tuna sandwiches. We hit the road and drove back into Carlsbad, NM where I had intended to post this – but the internet connections was so terrible we drove to the next closest Starbucks that aligned with our future destination. Only hang up was that it was 170 miles away in El Paso. The drive was downright treacherous at times – wind that blew us half-off the road, rain coming from every direction, two lane highways at 75 miles per hour and Texas trucks lifted to heights just high enough to shine lights right into opposing drivers eyes. Kate was a rockstar though and got us through.

Now though, it is nearly time for bed. Thanks again everyone for stopping by and catching up with us. We’ll be back in town to see everyone in Las Vegas in time for Christmas which is just a couple weeks away! There is still plenty more adventure to come, don’t you worry.

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Much love, Brian.